I just finished reading a post of my sister about Honest emotion. Boy, can I relate! I mean, I can’t even tell her exactly how I feel. She gets upset and refuses to listen or cannot accept what I say because I am her baby sister.
Growing up, I thought we should be open about our emotions. I am one person who is always open about exactly how I feel. I don’t know how to hide it. What’s wrong with expressing how I feel? I figured as long as I wasn’t hurting anybody, right?
After the failure of a major relationship, I often heard don’t waste your emotion. There’s no point in getting angry. And it’s so true. I’d find myself upset and the other person either doesn’t know or doesn’t care about how I feel. What a waste. Also just frustrating. Still, it’s one of the hardest things for me to do.
I have learned that I need to rein in my volatile emotions because if I don’t, they set off fireworks everywhere, and sometimes, I get caught in the backdraft.
Not to say I no longer feel anger. Boy, do I get angry sometimes! But I try not to rant while I’m at it. I find it just alienates people. I mean, who wants to hear me go on and on and on about what so and so has done this time? I know I wouldn’t want my errors and faults to be aired that way. Only maybe to a chosen few, say it once, say it twice and that’s it. Even these close friends and family will get fed up.
I think this is partly why I love the gym. There is one place where there is no anger. I cannot be angry and workout at the same time. I cannot even be sad. The least is that my mind becomes so focused on my exercise, it blanks my mind, soothing my ragged emotions. On great days, the endorphin levels really climb, and whoopee! Natural high on life.
Bottom line…I don’t want to grow old before my time, there are too many problems, getting angry gets me nowhere…so, I choose for the most part deal with the emotion as best I can, no explosions and I’m ever grateful for my wonderful family and good friends.
